||[May. 26th, 2009|10:37 am]
They say that angels were created to see beyond the bondage of time and space, meaning they possess knowledge of what has happened, what is happening and what will happen.
I think that humans have this gift too. It's just we lean on our feelings and relationships to much which ultimately blinds us to the bad things that have happened, are happening, and are about to happen. Naturally, this shouldn't be a bad thing. Humans are relational. Humans have free will and emotion.
That is, until it blinds you enough to take no action.
I suppose you think I'm bitter? I suppose you think I'm angry? That I sulk and seethe all the time now?
I can't pretend you're not right about that one.
Humans, though being relational, have the power to break other humans. Terrorist attacks, drug overdose, suicide...
A phone call.
Sometimes, they even rely on lowly tools just to try to save some face. A hitman, bribery...
Humans, however, have another natural tendency.
To many, this may seem like a weakness. But humans have evolved enough to learn from their mistakes. Humans can take control of their lives and steer it to where they want to go.
All I need is time. In fact, all I needed was your time, but seeing as you've chosen to expect the worse, we can now say that it's MY time now.
Please give me the courage now to do what I SHOULD do. To say what I SHOULD say, so I may redeem my soul. Please help me go through this painful process now, to heal an even bigger pain. Please help me hold on to the fact that the past is the past; and if there is something I should remember, let it be that given the current state, my future looks relatively bleak. So give me the courage to do what I am about to do with the utmost honesty, gentleness and pure love.
So help me God.